Dispatches from the Audience Edge
Okay, fangurl moment OVER. Actually I don’t think I was HAVING a fangurl moment. See, in that five seconds I got to talk to him, I wasn’t standing in a room with a hundred other people, talking to the “big important CNN anchor Anderson Cooper”. No. It was more like I was standing there talking to a very normal, very nice (very good looking) guy named Anderson all by myself and there wasn’t anyone else there. Apparently he seems to have that effect on people. I like it.
As for the audience....... generally, they were pretty normal. A lot of the women were very overdressed (dresses and updos, anyone?), but mostly we were just sort of hanging out waiting just to see some guy we’d seen on TV and apparently, we wanted to inspect him like some sort of butterfly we’d found flapping around in our house. There are, of course, three exceptions.
Topics of discussion:
(1) That crazy Anderfan
(2) The mean old ladies
(3) An obsessed gay guy I’d really like to smack
(4) and finally, my personal thoughts on Anderson.
(1)Let’s call her “Madame X”. There were quite a few people I talked to and asked them why they were there and such, but I did not actually talk to this woman. I didn’t have to. She was so loud you couldn’t miss her. I also have this talent where I can talk to one person and listen to someone else at the same time. This woman takes the cake. Look! A Troll!
To start with, while standing in line (and pretty much the whole time), she was acting like she was in an Herbal Essence commercial. Her hair flipped THIS way, and then THAT way. She wore more makeup then I do in one year combined! I couldn’t help but notice her silver and diamond ring on her left forefinger- she kept dramatically scooping her hair with that hand to make SURE no one failed to notice. I was not impressed.
“Oh YES,” she was saying to the person next to her. “I’ve met him SEVERAL times.” My ear zeroed in on her. Her tone of voice was just snob, snob, snob. “I’ve been to many book signings.” Oh, is that so? Since you got to personally be near Anderson for about ten seconds, and perhaps she’s been to maybe six signings... that means she’s MET him for a total of one whole minute. I am SO impressed. Keep going!
She didn’t need MY encouragement. Apparently, Madame X was more than happy to keep supplying information to the person nearest (and the person a hundred miles away, at that volume). My gosh, Madame X flew into New York from Chicago. Just for THIS?! Obsessed, anyone? Golly gee, I know who you are, Madame X. I bet now everyone else does too. Oh, and Madame X? The next time you decide to wear the sexy strappy sandals, I highly suggest you invest in a pedicure as opposed to the nine pounds of makeup on your face.
I’d say my biggest overall annoyance with Madame X is that she whipped out a copy of Wyatt Cooper’s book Families for Anderson to sign. My initial reaction was THE AUDACITY OF THAT. I’m not sure why it ticks me off, but it does. He signed it (which sort of surprised me) and also asked her where she got it (eBay) and how much she’d paid for it ($500). Um, sooooo, she was trying to impress him with her devotion by reading his father’s book? GET A LIFE, LADY. And some manners. And a personality that doesn’t grate on my soul like I’ve been sucked by leeches.
(2) I was standing in line with (and unfortunately had to sit by) two very MEAN old ladies. They complained about everything! They complained that they had to stand in line. They complained about whether or not their book bought last year would be signed or not. Actually one of them went and complained to the manager about that one. They complained when we sat down that they didn’t like the chairs. They complained that we were TOO CLOSE to the podium (you’re kidding, right?). They then complained that they didn’t get to jump up and be first in line to get their books signed. To make it worse, one of them was apparently a fangurl. She was probably in her sixties, and was sitting there talking to her friend about “how adorable” he is. Yeah, we noticed. Sometimes we notice OTHER things too. Occasionally, yeah, I’m not BLIND and I noticed he’s pretty cute, (can’t help it).... but I asked that particular woman what she liked about Anderson.
“Oh, his eyes,” she said.
“Okay, “ I said, “I mean besides that. What is it about his journalistic style that you like?”
“Well,” she said, actually thinking for a moment. “I like that he’s got so much expression!”
Oooookay. We’re not getting anywhere.
At that moment, the young girl next to me chimed in. “He’s just the most cutest thing ever,” she said. “I totally love him!”
I resisted the urge to scream right about then. You cannot love a person you do not know! But... whatever. “What is it that you love about him,” I asked, trying to see if there was something deeper to this than hormones.
“Well, I just love his smile, and I love how he talks, and his laugh is so cute!”
Okay I give up. Does she even hear a thing the man says? I doubt it. But I will agree I like his laugh- it makes ME laugh.
(3) But the real icing on the cake here is the gay man I was standing next to. For reference, I think that almost every man in the audience was gay, but I’m not offering my opinion on that. This man..... I recognized him immediately from his Flikr photos....
He was the Infamous Gay Stalker Of Anderson Cooper.
The look on his face was making me nervous. Very intense, very focused, very much ignoring everyone around him. His eyes freaked me out, too. They looked... weird. Just sort of odd, like he was somewhere else. I just HAD to ask him what was on his mind. He said two things that seriously alerted me to how crazy I think he is.
He toured Anderson’s old apartment when it was for sale. For no apparent reason other than he felt like being in it.
He’s been to more than TEN book signings. He attempted to convince me that he was showing up repeatedly to get books signed for his friends. YEAH RIGHT. I’m not buying that.
He literally put me on high alert status being near him. One, because I knew who he was, and Two, I know CRAZY when I see it.
I momentarily debated how much I’d like to kick his ass. I HATE STALKERS. I absolutely swear on anyone’s grave if I’d actually ran into THAT MAN outside the bookstore I would have punched him in the face just because he deserves it. He came all the way to New York from Pennsylvania because... I’m not sure I WANT to know. I’d kick his butt just for Anderson and every other person that has ever been stalked and isn’t able to do anything about it. *grrr*
(4) And finally, about Anderson himself. You’d think I couldn’t switch back to nice-mode after thinking about Stalker Guy, but I can. See, Anderson is very interesting. He’s got quite a presence! You cannot miss him. He’s just... wow. I actually thought I’d meet him and be like, oh whatever, but NO, it’s quite the opposite. I find him much more interesting than I had before the signing. Seeing someone in person, even for five seconds, can really broaden your view on who the person is.
And the biggest thing I noticed is his eyes. And NO, I don’t mean like that girl that was fainting about them. I mean that he is smiling, and his mouth is happy, but his eyes just AREN’T. His eyes are very sad. I noticed that right away. That sucks. A nice person like him, who has had a life like his, deserves to be happy. Don’t you agree?
This is my last post as a guest blogger on FreakSpeakers. Hope you enjoyed it, and I’m looking forward to questions and comments from the peanut gallery. Just don’t ask me my opinion on the most discussed subject on the planet, because although I am 100% positive on which side I would put him on, I’m not going to tell you what I think and therefore, please don’t ask me. Everything in this post is MY opinion, not anyone else's, and therefore feel free to call ME all the names you like. I don't bruise easily.
Thanks so much everyone for reading, and Chrisitane for letting me guest blog :)
174 comentarios:
his mouth is happy, but his eyes just AREN’T. His eyes are very sad.
Never seen them up close and personal but I would agree that there is a definite sadness in the eyes. It's something I honed in on years ago. He's had a lot of loss in his life which is bound to contribute to that and there may be other troubling issues that none of us are privy to.
I think one time I described it as "the absolute magnitude of the depth of sadness" and someone made fun of me.
What. I thought it was a pretty good damn description of despair.
Sometimes I get the feeling that a lot of his so-called fans have never watched 360. Maybe they're fans from The Mole or something but they don't seem to know much about him as a journalist.
Love the shirt!
Lee
Actually some girls behind me were talking about the Mole. I've never seen it! They were the girls that were making "squee!" noises when they came out of the bookstore. I was standing out there, watching people come out, out of curiosity towards what they would say and do.
And I know what you mean, Lee. Anderson is a what? A journalist? WTF is that?... is the general reaction. They treat him more like a rock star. Which apparently, he'd chose to be (over a sports star I guess).
And YEAH, I love my shirt too. I purposely got the one with long sleeves so that I can wear it when I ride :)
Another Anderson-fan blog is saying there is a blog posting mean things about the book signing last night but no one seems to want to give the link to that site.
Does anyone know what blog I am talking about and care to divulge the link?
I agree with the eyes, I saw it last year when I went to the NYC book signing. The eyes tell it all. I find it more difficult to tell from the tv, but in person, so obvious.
Gee, I think they are talking about US. I don't recall being too polite in my dissection of some of the people I saw.
Oh wait, were you being sarcastic?
newsjunkie: I don't know who they were talking about, but your comments didn't sound mean to mean. Honest, but if people think that is mean, well, I don't know what to say.
I'm surprised that Anthony-stalker-guy was allowed to in his apartment. Don't they pre-qualify people to keep creeps like him out? Think everybody knows about this guy at this point. I hope somebody is keeping an eye on this guy.
I wasn't being sarcastic
I'm disgustingly brutally honest and I always say exactly what I think, without regard to whether it may hurt someone's feelings. I like the same thing right back- please don't placate me.
And GEE anon 7:19, how DID YOU EVER figure out to whom I was referring as the crazy stalker guy? lol. I made it as obvious as possible without actually naming him. Actually he's in one of the pictures that Christiane posted. He's wearing blue (go figure)... see if you can find him. I don't think the realty company really cared at that point, to my knowledge he wasn't actually living in it at the time. Oooh, I did forget one thing to mention that he said in his description of the place:
"It smelled good."
MY GOD that is creepy, isn't it??
The stalker guy is quite famous in the Anderworld, he uses his name when posting on the internet about his activities and makes no secret about what he does, although I don't think he will use the word stalking.
If you think Anthony is full of crap, take this little test. Check your local paper for an upcoming Open House. Don't look at modest properties, go for the McMansions located in the best neighborhood. Make sure the house/condo/co-op is at least a mil. Call the realtor to view the property. The scrutiny you'll be subjected to before you can enter said house is crazy. NO ONE w/out substantial financial means is allowed in. A realtor is not going to waste their time to show a place to someone incapable of purchasing said house. If stalker boi saw the inside of his apt., I'm the messiah.
OUTSTANDING post, newsjunkie! I knew it...whatever you do, you do well - as in Chemistry classes and the National Test coming up.
I've never seen Anderson's eyes in person, but I've always wondered why when I see them on print or on tv, they scream a certain amount of saddness & dispair. I don't envy his probable inner demons.
As for the idiotic claims of other blogs against this blog and you, if they don't like it here, they are welcome to leave. I don't think many of us snoop on their territory.
anon 9:53 am: Thank you. That was my point exactly. And especially if the owner is a well-known person, the realtor is probably even more careful who they let in. When Jackie O's Fifth Avenue apartment went on the market after her death, anyone who looked at it were required to sign a confidentiality agreement just to get in so they could talk about it after they left.
OMG, you met stalker boy!!! That guy is crazy. I'm suprised the security around Anderson didn't recognize him from his 10 visit!! Yuck, I'll punch him out if you don't get there first :-)
I love your descriptions of the people you met - and sadly because the Anderworld is a small one, I'm pretty sure I know exactly who Madam X is! Did you see anyone (especially Madam X) give a gift to Anderson? I bet he got some good ones!!
Hey, stalker boy sticks out like a damn twinkie in the diet aisle of the health food store.
There was security all over the place, I wasn't worried.... hmmm...
...just read a rival blog (I almost never do but the suspense was killing me....) and here is a direct quote from their spy: My friend Christina (Minion) was already there. She scored a really sweet spot in line.. If you go back and read OUR post, you'll see I was standing right next to CHRIS, who is the person the spy is talking about. Well that explains a lot. Note to spy from other blog: if you're going to take your nose ring out and replace it with one of those plastic studs, I just thought I'd let you know that it looks like a there is a gob of booger right on your nostril. I'm just SAYIN', you know, so you know for next time that it looks gross.
Heh.
YES. The world is so small and is getting so much smaller. If Madame X is who I think she might be, she waited on me, husband & kid on our way to NYC a few weeks ago. I know she's a crazy Anderfan cuz a loud voice travels very far in a plane. On the clock, she's giddying over him like a lovesick spinster. The whole aircraft could hear her coo, sigh and pant. It was repulsive. Kid asked where she resides. Her reply, CHICAGO. For Anderson's sake, let there not be two crazy Christina's sharing space on our planet.
Actually, if I read your comment correctly, I think you're thinking that the "Chris" I'm talking about and Madame X are the same person. Nope, they are not. "Chris" was actually very very nice and asked me to call Madame X the "Line Troll" in my blog post. I called her a Troll, close enough. Both of them are in the pictures that Christiane posted. Madame X was quite displeased that her photo was posted here because it was done "without her permission". Guess what honey. You're at a public event, therefore, you're up for grabs. If her photo had been posted somewhere by the professional photog that was snapping away, I doubt she would have complained. She would have been dancing all over the place and telling everyone about it at the top of her lungs.
Nuts is a good description of her. I truly do not understand the Anderson obsession. Human nature completely mystifies me sometimes. I mean, I LIKE the guy, but c'mon... how can you be so... OUT THERE when in comes to that, since no one knows hardly a damn thing about the man?
The fan I'm referring to is also a Christina. She waits chair tables in the sky(domestic flts), lives in Chicago, attends book signings galore because she can fly around the country and stalk Anderson for practically free. I gather from her loud voice enflight, she's a mega Republican and pro Iraq. So, he has two crazies from Chicago who stalk him. Ewwww.
Okay, well, Madame X is in one of the photos, is that the person you're talking about? Because the "flying for free" part would make a lot of sense... I was wondering how on earth she could just jump all over the place like that.
This place is fun.
Hang around. It only gets better.
I bet she was the one who filtered the Delta/Oxaca information
Newsjunkie: who is the rival blog? But perhaps you don't want the words to appear here, I would understand.
Anderson must surely recognize Stalker Boy by now, no? Anderson must get the willies each and every time he sees the guy flanking him at every turn.
Unfortunately it's the top blog for the Andercommunity. I never EVER name other blogs :( You're going to have to figure it out. Google is your friend.
Yeah anon 2:15, and that's what pisses me off. He shouldn't be in the position where he "gets the willies" from some creep. Hence the reason I'd like to meet Stalker Boy in a dark alley. Stalker Boy? Meet my mean side.
That's the same chick we met on our flt from O'Hare to NYC. That's when I said our small world has gotten smaller. "Anderson Cooper" poured from her lips as she served drinks and snacks. No identifiable shame on her part, either. During her boasts, she winked at men with a few similar characteristics to AC. I doubt she was the Oxaca/ Delta debacle. Her vision of AC is definitely straight up and almost ready.
Mmmmm... I don't know what you mean by "straight up and ready"? Um. Huh?
I was the girls sitting right behind you...
I know absolutely EVERYONE you were talking about. You pretty much hit the nail on the head regarding them.
When Madame X whipped out Families...I thought...as if he doesn't have his OWN copy of the book. Way to steal that from the library biotch.
----
AND to clairify...MY friend CHRISTINA is not anyone in the Anderson community she's a friend from college. I didn't KNOW there was someone named minion out there. Oops my bad.
Glad you enjoyed my review.
Hi Lavender Blue :) Yes, I heard you talk about the Mole. But you're not the "girls" I was talking about in that instance... you were NOT walking out making squee noises. They, were hysterical. It was all I could do to hold in my *snort* noise.
And there are now THREE "Chris" people out there. Oh boy. This is getting confusing. I pretty much liked every person I met with the exceptions noted in my post.
Just to clarify, I'm LOSING MY MIND on this. It's very hard to discuss people you met at an event when you don't know their names or they're using fake ones. There are now THREE "Chris" out there, more than one set of girls talking about The Mole (which I insulted, and was not Lavender Blue I don't think), the crazy Anderfan chick is sending hate mail (go fuck yourself, lady), I'm going bananas because I'm trying to figure out who is who and not insult the people I actually LIKED. Of course, I hate nose rings (ew, ew, ew) so if the nose ring person is actually Lavender Blue, I wasn't attempting to insult you, I just HATE NOSE RINGS. Ok? And actually yes I liked your post but I can't stand the Anderfan community blogs in general... so... no offense taken I hope. You were pretty nice.
No I definitely don't have a nose ring. I got my ears pierced a year ago and that was traumatic enough.
I was talking about the Mole but in a really facetious way. Although I do love the Mole.
I did squee at one point, but I was the one saying he's a robot and he's not real.
I remember a bunch of really loud girls like two groups in front of my in the line. THEY were annoying.
Well, we all know which one was ME :) I've been back over to have a look in the comments section of that blog I never read (seriously, I don't, but this is fun)... and the person I recognize as the one I was talking to (I recognized the poison ivy story) said that a rude Anderfan was around. Um, well, I'm not rude and I'm not an Anderfan either, so I hope she wasn't talking about me :( That would make me sad.
"Straight up and almost ready" was Christina a/k/a MadamX statement when husband asked her if she was aware of her object of obsessions gender preference for dates. I'm assuming by that, if she uncovered AC's vacation partner, she would have said nothing or remarked that they were FRIENDS only.
Ah, yes, that makes sense. I said somewhere that the women want him to be straight and the gay men want him to be gay. Uh.... I do have my opinion on it. Of course.
Oh yes... I must say... I analyzed his signature as compared to the one I saw from October of last year. It's a pseudo-science, sure, but I've never been let down on it. Anyway, the signature shows your true person, who you really are. Anderson? Compared to October 2006, he's utterly destabilizing. Falling apart, LITERALLY. Oh, now I'm sad. That SUCKS. I hope whatever the hell is stressing him out will GO AWAY.
Whom is Madame X sending hate mail to? She's the one with one foot on the banana peel and the other on the nutcase tightrope. It's really not smart to blab your insanities to a plane full of strangers. We needed to be in NY, couldn't get 3 coach tickets, so we went First Class. It was us and others flying for business. I can't imagine the junk she spilled towards the back of the plane. There seemed to be more characters in coach.
That's not good news newsjunkie. I actually rely on your handwriting analysis as one of the very few keys to unlock what's going on in one's head. My kids best friend was diagnosed with anorexia. Like yourself, she's a younger version of a science nerd. Anyways, she wants to have her friends writing analyzed to see what went wrong and where.
Send it to me. You can find my contact info on my page, click me.
Anyway... I haven't said this directly and straight out yet, but now I'm going to... he looks ANOREXIC. God I hope not. That's one hell of a load to carry.
I wonder sometimes, if in all that tons of shit he gets in his email inbox, if he ever gets stuff that makes him feel okay. And I don't mean the NOLA stuff where they are saying thanks for caring. I mean real sincere letters that let him know he's a true, valuable person, and that his caring nature has affected people. That what he does matters. And... that he can actually believe it and feel better about himself. It's highly evident that he does NOT. That is terrible. I hate to see pain.
Oh, and Madame X is sending hate mail to Christiane.
Compared to October 2006, he's utterly destabilizing. Falling apart, LITERALLY. Oh, now I'm sad. That SUCKS.
In this case, I hope the handwriting analysis is wrong. In the last few weeks or so, he's seemed like he was actually feeling better. At least on the show, he has been in better spirits. Not last night, however, his mood was back to gloomy, IMO.
Another thing is he "jokingly" said he felt like he was 80 years old. Maybe not so much of a joke after all.
You'd think after being in a room where half of them were worshiping fans, he'd feel better. That's what most people would say. Personal opinion: I think that would make him feel WORSE. Why? Because it makes you question who you really are! Who am I, why am I here, why do I crave this attention? Um, yeah. That would make me feel like crap. Most people don't like to hold their soul up to a mirror and have a good look.
@ anon 3:58- okay, upbeat mood has nothing to do with how you feel about yourself on the inside. A handwriting analysis is really complicated :) I'd need a WHOLE sample in order to really pick at his brain. And I mean in handwriting, not printing. I didn't even pay attention to what he wrote in my book in that respect because it's not going to tell me anything.
A GOOD sample would be on unlined paper, and written to another person (very important it's not a note to self because everyone looks psychotic) and in a ballpoint pen. The body of the sample tells ALLLLLLL about you on the inside- who you are, your work ethic, your mindset, whether or not you're crazy, your sexual preferences, whether you're depressed or suicidal, you name it, it's in there. The signature compares who you really are with how you present yourself in public (in his case, as with anyone in celebrity status, it says "look at me I want to feel important"), plus it says a whole load about your self esteem.
His is so low I couldn't even READ it.
A few people would say that you can't judge based on an autograph. Oh yes you can. Especially if you look at about twenty of them (I did). Unlined paper, written to another person *unfortunately in marker*... almost perfect. Now I'm all acting like his mother and hoping he eats and sleeps and stuff, lol.
I imagine last night he was tired, after all he signed so many books and he always looked thin.
now i wanna know about the "squee" girls.
this was a very interesting read.
Kid's going to try to find one at home or get a writing sample in school tommorow. (the friend w/ anorexia).
Oh GOD, the squee girls. It's my favorite "dumb shit the Anderfans say" phrase. It's not exactly a sound, it's the attitude. You know, the giggling, squeaking, "o!m!g!" type of thing.
Speaking of giggling, I just laughed my ass off at the comment I just submitted to the 360 blog. If it gets posted I'm going to straight up die from the lack of oxygen I'm going to get from rolling on the floor with laughter.
i know the type you're talking about, but what did they do? were they just giggly or did they do something specific? because i was there and saw some 'squee girls' and want to know if we're thinking of the same people.
i also know exactly who you're talking about with stalker guy. he was dangerously close to me.
anonymousaba, that's great. You don't actually have to send it to me by snail mail or anything, take it to a Kinko's or whatever and scan it, then you can send it to me by email.
I've actually done FIVE analysis' right off of THIS blog from people sending me stuff. I always just send an email back to the person with what I've analyzed. If you agree with what I said (or not), feel free to actually say so on here. Makes me feel better :) The only catch- you have to sign your real name on it. No I wouldn't divulge that under torture. Plus... seriously. Don't send me stuff that you copied like a poem, it's hard to extrapolate anything from that. It's supposed to be a LETTER, you know? Dear Sharla, blah blah blah I think think this is a crock of shit blah blah, love, Bob Smith (lol).
And no if I actually got a copy of something of Anderson's I wouldn't tell you what I found. An analysis of his signature is all you get :D
Nah, the squee girl type are harmless. It's the serious ones that scare me. Or stalker guy... yeah, he really scared me. In a bad way. I don't pick up vibes from people easily (I rely on my "read the body language" talent) but from THAT guy? Oh my GOD, the negative "I'm a nutcase" vibes were practically visible.
i really didn't pick up on that much from him, he just seemed nice, if not a little weird/whacked out, having at least 3 books with him.
after reading this a friend and i said to each other "he was right there, we know who this is" which is a little funny.
i know i was a little excited, and may have let out a squee after my friend and i let it sink in exactly what we got him to write in our books, but nothing major. i think we got all the excitement out of our systems the might before.
I was a basket case the night before, as was highly evident in my comments here. I like to imagine all the million things that can go wrong.
And I admitted right there in my post that I practically squeed myself, lol. Couldn't help it. I swear, the man struck me like I'd dropped my hairdryer into the bathtub while I was standing in it.
Fortunately, I lived.
@Newsjunke, evidently handwriting analysis is a lot more complex than I realized. It's an interesting subject.
His is so low I couldn't even READ it.
This is making me sad. I don't know him personally, never will, he's has more and accomplished more than I could ever dream of, and yet here I am feeling bad for this man. It's just that he seems like a fairly decent person and if he's going through some trauma or has issues nagging at him and preventing him from getting any enjoyment out of his life, then I kind of feel bad about that.
Yes, I know what you mean. My first thought at the sad eyes was, "I want to know what is making him so sad". I think I have "broken wing" syndrome, you know, where I have to just fix everything and make it better.
Well I can't.
Neither can anyone else.
That's entirely up to the person; it comes from within. You cannot find yourself in another, it's all YOU.
OMG LMAO, they POSTED IT!! hahahahahahahahaha
WOW one day away and this place exploded!
Congrats Newsjunkie for your report.
What puzzles me is that a lot of people KNOW who this Anthony is, and they simply encourage him to keep on doing it.
I used to be a member of Anderholics, and the Mod had a TIGHT leash on him and called him for what he is worth. His accounts of the stalkings were BEYOND CREEPY! the last one was a "pilmigrage" of all the places AC used to live, how he standed under the cornice of the main entrance of his building talked to his neighbors, and such. Some people in that community REALLY ENCOURAGE IT, but it really surprises me, that with THAT background other boards and Blogs treat him like a hero, giving him a forum for his creepiness. The don't understand that they are doing the same that NBC did to Cho.
I REALLY HOPE HE NEVER SNAPS AND HURTS ANDERSON! because if that happens a couple of communities will have a lot to explain.
P.S. He sells ACs books on ebay. DON'T SUPPORT THE STALKING BY BUYING HIS MERCHANDISE!
Ew, he SELLS it? What a horrid thing to do. I can understand perhaps photos or something, but an autographed book? No, that's beyond me.
THANKS A LOT RUDY, for making me worried now that that NUT-JOB is going to lose his mind. Um... let's see. Perhaps it's knowledge of things like that, that are stressing Anderson out? GEEZ. He probably has ulcers by now. I would!
Okay now I'm wishing I'd waited in that dark alley. I would proudly sit in my jail cell after I broke my of my fingers on his FACE. CREEP!!!! Ok, now I sound insane, lol. I'm kidding :D Seriously though, if this guy is REALLY following Anderson around in a bad way I hope he calls the police. A LOT. Like Anderson said to that Psychologist (I think that's what she was)... what do you do? How do you NOT encourage them?
I mean, like he said, negative contact is STILL contact. So.... do you ignore them? What? I don't even know.
By the way. Some blogs claim that Freaks is not reliable in their information. I beg to differ!!! What about THEIR information?
Why golly gee, I'm about to supply you with that.
The er- "Holly Blog" made a post about the book signing from last night, with a picture supplied by our very own favorite stalker-we-hate.
Oh... really? That's from last night? That's funny. It was taken a year ago from a signing in BUFFALO. AND THE PICTURE IS ON EBAY!!!! Go look for yourself.
newbie here
this place is a riot
a riot? yeah. this is great.
wow, it's only been couple of days and this place exploded -)
@rudy
I couldn't agree with you more, that's exactly what comes to mind reading about all this. I did notice that some popular in the "anderworld" blogs used (and use) his information and say thanks to him for providing it.
I have to say I feel sorry for Anderson. In Jack Rice's podcast Anderson discussed the fact that "reports" like the showering in the gym with his shorts on story take away from the job he tries very hard to do every night.
The guy can't help the way he looks. I know it is his decision to keep it private or not, but that he won't even discuss his sexual orientation only adds fuel to the fire, causing these kinds of stories to be put out there when it seems what he wants to be known for is his work. I am embarrassed for him.
Just my opinion.
but that he won't even discuss his sexual orientation only adds fuel to the fire, causing these kinds of stories to be put out there when it seems what he wants to be known for is his work.
Okay... so you just pointed out that he wants to be known for his WORK, therefore, his SEX LIFE isn't anyone's business. RIGHT? Makes sense to me. I heard the interview where he said that he thought the "showering in my boxers" story was "hilarious" and "absurd". He actually said absurd twice in the space of about a minute. Um, you think he thinks it's absurd? Yeah. Anyhow, it's a real tight rope for him to walk, I would think. What is he supposed to do? I can't answer that.
If he answers, he does exactly what he doesn't want- call attention to his personal life. If he doesn't answer... it essentially does the same thing.
Either way you look at it, he's sort of screwed.
He can't win either way.
GOOD LORD, have you guys looked at the comments section on the 360 blog? The moderator must have been drinking. They're posting all SORTS of things I cannot believe made it on. The commenters are talking to each OTHER, just like we are here- I've never EVER seen that. It's cracking me up. First I put up something about Anderson having bloggorrhea, and then one person thought it was funny and another asked me what it meant. Um, well, I just posted again (still waiting) to see if my response gets up (who the hell knows, I think the moderator is stoned tonight) and this time, instead of yelling at Anderson to CUT IT OUT with his incessant promos, I told him instead to be himself because I think he's funny... and that he has diarrhea of the keyboard.
MAN I hope that gets on there. I died laughing when I wrote it.
I wonder if he ever remembers anyone that he sees at the signings, you know, will he be like, HOLY CRAP IT'S THAT ONE CHICK THAT WAS WEARING THE FREAKSPEAKERS SHIRT when he reads it? Heh, who knows. Must be nice for him to sometimes be able to put a face on the name he sees quite often- both on the blog and in the emails that get sent (I've actually only sent two in, and one was practically hate mail, the other was... not).
All I know is, I am looking forward to Anderson actually reading some of the comments tonight (oooh, I hope he does). I'm cracking the hell UP over here.
Hi everyone!
I'm happy you are all having fun. Due to the high traffic we are experimenting lately and all the newbies, I just want to recall our rules, please don't make personal attacks, don't mention people by real names nor attack other blogs.
and BTW
THANKS SHARLA And all of our correspondents for such a good job... Baby steps! but solid!
So keep having fun!
What gets me about that stalker-dude is that he has a "husband" of 17 years, and he apparently is stupid on Anderson. I am like so embarrassed for Anderson.
Yes, the AC360 Blog had a "blog fart" tonight. Bloggers were talking, and in some cases, bashing each other and not one even commented on the topic of the post! Incredible!
Good job Freakspeakers on some entertaining posts! The celebrity or star fascination that some people have of Anderson is something I'll never understand but it does make for some spicy reading!
@anon 8:43
let's say he would publicly announce his orientation. Do you really think that would put an end to endless speculation? It will only fuel the fire. Something similar to feeding stalkers fantasy by showing any attention to them. From then on the attention to him and people who appear around him will become more focused and it will move on to who he's with and so on. And whatever he would say it wouldn't match what one half or the other expects him to be and accusations will fly. So why bother? He doesn't owe this information to the public. It's very unhealthy for a journalist, people care more about gossip then his work.
@9:53
the "stalker guy" was boasting on one of the boards that he got inside of anderson's apartment and described some things in it. Was he telling the truth or no makes no difference to me. I find this more dangerous then squeeing girls.
anon 8:43: people gossip about him now when he is keeping mum on the subject.
Is everybody all jigged up just because of the book signing last night?
I think all the blogs are still on a caffeine high from yesterday! What scares me about "stalker boy" is that he was boasting on a blog that I came across - that he sat in front of Anderson's apartment building and ate his lunch, and then questioned some of his neighbors about seeing Anderson. He even went so far to link the photo's that were supposed to be of Anderson's apartment window's. I'd say that's pretty much the definition of a stalker.
I'm pretty sure the moderator of that blog asked him to leave.
but he is welcome at ATA and Anderloads just to have information. "die hard anderfans" are the ones promoting the stalking
that is something that never stops to amaze me
So no one else here think Anderson is like totally in love with Erica? I almost vomited last night after watching the two of them.
Okay, some comments to address:
(1) I don't think Anderson is "stupid" on Erica. That's just dumb. He likes her, sure. So? He's not all in LoooooVe with her like you just said. I think they're freaking CUTE together. I like it when she's on, very much! No puking HERE!
(2) Crazy-stalker-boy has me rather nervous, I'll tell you that. The last time I ran into someone that freaked me out that bad... um. Okay well it wasn't nice. I too, thought of this... boyfriend/partner/whatever of his. For one thing I doubt it's 17 years- he's not OLD enough, I don't think. But even so, it's like all the other people with significant others... doesn't that sort of bug them that the person is all wiggy over Anderson?
Well, maybe not, because most people realize how inaccessible Anderson is to the general public and so... they can look but not touch.
Hopefully.
And I've figure out how Stalker Boy got into Anderson's apartment, due to an anonymous tip from someone that may be actually posted later. It was an OPEN HOUSE, people. They just open up the damn door and pretty much the public wanders in. Confidentiality agreement? Uh... what for? It not like they were touring Graceland.
And btw I hate Elvis, don't even start.
(3) I agree with Ivy- he owes nothing to the public in regards to his personal life. I am still surprised this comes up over and over. Who is Anderson Cooper? Ask that to a random person and half the time they don't know and mostly the other time you get all sorts of bizarre shit coming out.
Occasionally, I hear "oh, he's a CNN anchor." THANK YOU. Anderson is a fucking journalist!!! Aaaaag!!!! It's not his fault that he's good looking. Oh, duh on that one. Like we've talked about before, he could totally tell the camera guy to stop zooming in on his ass but he apparently doesn't. We've also shredded him to bits and mostly decided that he's insecure and therefore likes the (not exactly good) attention. DAMMIT I hate that.
Perhaps when he fills up that big giant hole in his soul... he'll be strong enough to stand on his own and just... be himself and that will actually make him less interesting to the public.
What will he be in five years?
*Well, for one thing, he'll have hit 45. (Actually I have a suggestion- I heard you drive a TOWNCAR, Anderson. Please tell me it's not true. My MOTHER wants a Towncar. Go turn that shit in and get a Maserati. PLEASE.)
*Anyway, in five years... who knows whether or not CNN will renew him (probably). He might be in a war zone and... okay I can think of all sorts of thing that depress me so I'm not going into it.
*Let's see... all his hair could fall out like Telly Savalas.
*He might develop severe OCD like Howie Mandel and end up with agoraphobia, refusing to leave his house.
*He might get married to someone.
*He might have kids by then.
*He might still be single and own sixty-four dogs instead.
Who knows. All I know is, I think people are going to find him a whole lot less fascinating in five years than they do now is all. Well, perhaps not, because people still find Steven Tyler interesting and he looks like a raisin someone left on the windowsill too long.
NewsJunkie: check out Stalker-boy-Anthony's profile on flickr.com he's got pictures of his "husband" of 17 years as he puts it or words like that.
Of course, he could be giving us the business on that when you consider all the other stuff we know about him.
I used his name because it is so obvious now who he is and he himself uses his name and puts out pictures of himself and his partner for all to see, so I will assume it is o.k. I use his name. If that is a problem here I won't do it again.
O.K., I will admit Anderson is not in love with Erica to want to marry her kind of love, but I have gotten to the point some of it may be for show. I will point out that two other Anderson blogs just LOOOOOOOVE this Anderica thing, made alot of noise when Erica wasn't around for awhile, they tried it with Randi Kaye and Kirin Chetry (sp?) and they all bitched like hell to bring Erica back, what have you done, you've ruined it, so now Erica was back and since then Erica and Anderson seem to been laying it on a little thicker than before all this noise. Nauseating. Ratings.
I've seen Anthony's flickr account. Every other pic is of Anderson. EW. Not ew at Anderson, but EWWWwwww at how creepy Anthony is!!!
I'm still having trouble with the age, since I found pics of him at the place he went to school, and it listed his age.
Think that I Anderson really likes Erica and who wouldn't? She seems like a really smart and wonderful person, who has a great sense of humor...And I don't think that she and Anderson lay it on too thick...They just have great chemistry together...
I also just want to say that I agree with newsjunkie...This stalker dude just completely grosses me out and from the comments I have seen about him here, I truely feel sorry for Anderson...I cannot imagine what it may feel like to have this amount of unwanted attention...This guy really needs to get a life...His obsession is unhealthy and digusting and appears to be going down a very dangerous path...He has completely crossed the line....
Crossed the line... OH YEAH. That guy scares me!! And I'm hard to scare!!
Someone should stalk HIM. That would be great retribution. Can you see it?
Pics of the lovely Anthony complete with a big giant blog about how wonderful he is (barf) and how they're in LOVE with him (and they've never met) plus inviting others to follow him around and take his picture in front of HIS house, where HE works, and then get into his house and talk about it... plus interview the neighbors and post what they say. Don't forget the fawning and drooling.
EW.
Actually that would be hilarious. Right back atcha, FREAK BOY.
Newjunkie-
This guys is unbelievable...As much as I love talking about Anderson and his work and as much as I am curious about his life, I can't imagine doing the stuff this guy does...He is dangerous...There is just no other to describe his behavior, and I hope and pray that someone does something to stop it before something terrible happens...
I volunteer.
I would love to see what you would do to this guys...I get the feeling that he would not live to see the light of day...
@blueberry
this guy sends picture from a year ago to his "friend's" blog as it's from the event he attended (he did) yesterday... looks like this boy craves for attention. Through that in the mix with everything else he did or said. He's a time bomb.
@anon 12:15pm...
I think that is what scares me the most.
anon 107: you're correct, it wasn't one of those blogs, they seem to post anything this guy sends them trusting that it is legit. Wake up!
This stalker guy gives me the creeps. This may have been said already, but I don't understand why he was allowed to stay and not asked to leave...if they know he's stalking Anderson? I feel bad for Anderson, no one should have to put up with that kind of crazy.
My guess is that he has never harassed him directly, just posted about it and taken pictures and stuff. And because Anderson is who he is... well, people take pictures of him. It rather alarms me though, what this guy actually SAYS on the net. But because no threats (like, how he'd like to kidnap him or something)... what can they do? Nothing. HE hasn't done anything, so there is no legal recourse.
That's what I think, anyway. It seems to me that a few people are keeping tabs on him though. If he does or says anything nutty, he's likely to be turned in, don't you think?
Madame X reminds me of the evil witch from the Wizard of Oz
@anon 12:15- the problem with time bombs, is that sometimes they don't have a visible timer and therefore you can't figure out how to diffuse it.
But you can certainly hear it ticking, and that will most definitely scare the shit out of you.
Have we worked this section to death or can we post more?
it's an open thread -post if you have anything to say, just keep the blog rules in mind per mod's request -)
anderson talked about stalking on 360 yet again.
Stalker-Dude
I think Anderson's way of dealing with stalkers may be encouraging this type of behavior.
First of all, behavioral psychology tells you that you should not reward the conduct that you wish will become extinct. And he does reward it! How? Talking about his feelings about it on TV and dedicating whole segments to it. He is personalizing his experience and in a way he is directly talking to these people through his TV segments. IMHO this is a very stupid thing to do. They may be a lot of stalkers, but every time he talks about this, they may be thinking he is talking ABOUTT them and TO THEM ONLY(scary, I know) and not about the crazy crowd as a whole.
Second he should state only once and in a final statement what will happen if the stalking behaior persist - he has to be determined to stop it. No ambivalence, period.
Behavior never becomes extint when you exhibit so much ambivalence towards it. Its like the guy who calls you one day fails to call you for a week and then calls you back. Guess what? You will be waiting for the guy because you know he will likely call you back. Stalkers should not be welcomed at book signings. His PA, bodyguard, etc. should know who these people are and simply state they are not welcomed and make sure they arent. Most places reserve the right of admission so I dont think this wil be a legal issue at all.They should be permanently banned from having further contact. E-mails, letters personal contact, signings, etc. They should make sure these people are not able to send him stuff either. Im sure CNN can find a way of not recieving stuff from them, this will prevent them from creating fantasies regarding Anderson's possible reactions to their gifts etc...
Behavior fails to become extint when you respond in intervals. Anderson should decide how he wants to deal with this and stick to it. He should be determined and final when it comes to what consequences wil arise if the behavior persists. He should not reward the behavior talking about it and especially his feelings towards the situation. You know what, for stalkers a good or bad emotion or response from Anderson will do just the same. They wont feel sorry for him, or have a conscience.
Anderson has the right to privacy and his vital space and whoever disrupts that has the right to know that they will be dealt with.
@ betty b, did you study phsychology?
I think it must be difficult to restrict the entrance to events like book signing, there are people who might not stalk him by trying to contact directly, but by trying to wait for him near his work or home an so on. Plus as far as I understand there's no entrance security check at the book signings. Last year I was at a lecture and there was virtually no security (at least visible) at all which shocked me. Seems like the last couple of events security was in place, that's what I think his team relied on.
@ Ivy
Yes I study psych
And I agree with you, attempting to control all of his stalkers is impossible. But they are people whose patterns are predictable and you can avoid, period. Anderson and CNN can send the message that there are people watching and taking action. Seurity at book signings and public events is s good idea. A PA that knows what happens in the Andercommunity is also a good idea. If he does not feel safe, chances are he wont be safe, period! And he should not encourage that kind of behavior.Having crazy fans is not a blessing or an honor, yet he seems ambivalent towards what this means to him. Defenseless, talking to a guest on his show as to how to deal with this? Come one, take a stand! Talking about this on TV is wrong, he is sending the wrong message. He is saying " Hey stalkers you have power over me. Go on, keep on doing what you do best, because I will keep reacting to it, and you will continue to have access to me, you will continue to have an effect on me, my emotions are yours to control and tamper with."
I think he is not taking this seriously enough when it comes to actions. He is just worrying about this and letting his stalkers know he is worried and anxious, therefore appearing weak, helpless and undetermined. Not a good idea. There are limits and most people dont abide by them unless they are presurred too, and convinced the "victim" will also take measures. He has the resources, we are not talking about a domestic violence victim etc. This is different and can be minimized if he acts serious enough about it. Serious as in acting not as in scared...
I think he misinterpreted what the shrink said about ignoring stalkers. You ignore them in a way you dont respond reinforcing their behavior, you dont take their calls, gifts, books to be signed etc. Now you do what you have to do to place limits and feel secure. His staff can do this, therefore he wouldnt be responding to them personally. That would send the message: "I am a very busy person, dont have time for this nonsense, I am not interested, never will be, my staff wil take care of you, not me. I will go on with my life, cause you have no effect on me."
Thats kind of a better way to deal with it than "I am vulnerable, you have complete access to me with no consequences"
Just my opinion...
And I think just about everybody knows who stalker-boy is, his name, what he looks like, and I am sure Anderson knows as well. He must cring every time he sees him. Yet I would imagine that you cannot just stop him from freely walking into a bookstore and happening upon a book signing and getting in line unless he has said or done something to pose a threat.
"Stalkers should not be welcomed at book signings"
I agree, but as people are walking in, how do you identify who this stalker is and, should you decide to deny them entry, can you prove they are in fact a stalker.
Halleluia for Betty B's comment. You summed it up exactly for me. Sometimes I am less than eloquent.
I think he is not taking this seriously enough when it comes to actions. He is just worrying about this and letting his stalkers know he is worried and anxious, therefore appearing weak, helpless and undetermined.
I think I tried to say that earlier. Stalking is about power. It's about controlling the other person and the weakness is a big deal. Victims are perceived as weak; the weak are perceived as victims. That poor man. I really feel for him. I really do. Having a stalker is no piece of cake. If you're not confident in who you are (I was not at the time, and I ended up with my second stalker)... they win. They terrorize the shit out of you. They make you afraid to walk out your door. They make you look behind you as you drive and shake as you walk down the street.
And those crazy fuckers eat it up like candy. It literally fuels their soul with an unquenchable fire. They become even more determined.
Anderson needs to stand up for himself. I'm not exactly sure how he's supposed to do that but I'd start with... just himself. He is not a confident person with who he is. Actually he seems rather embarrassed with himself or something. If he believes in himself and becomes strong on the inside, he will carry himself much higher and the weakness will be gone- making him less of a victim.
Of course, people are going to obsess and freak out over people like him anyway. Mostly, they are harmless. It's the other ones I'm worried about. I know- Anderson? Stop worrying about it. I'll worry about it for you- and I'm one hell of a strong person inside. :)
Maybe I'm wrong, and I realize he is on live TV conducting an interview and it could be just for that, but it almost sounds like he is trying to get advice on how to deal with stalkers right then and there with the lady he is interviewing on the tv, if you know what I'm saying.
He should be talking to and getting help from whoever it is at CNN who provides him security or whatever else people do instead of airing his anxiety about it on national television. I would think CNN should/would pay for some amount of security for him and he can certainly afford to pay himself regardless.
It's not the point to have security or not. Certainly having security is most likely going to keep the crazies directly off of you (although... ever seen him around the streets of NYC? By HIMSELF?!). The point is, it's terrorizing and therefore demoralizing to him as a human being. Just because you know you've got a bodyguard with a neck like a damn bulldog doesn't make you feel safe. Nope, not at all.
Newsjunkie: Point taken. Yes he spends alot of time walking around NY by himself, an open target. The poor little guy, all skinny and little and vulnerable.
Good god, he's not a poor little guy all skinny and vulnerable.
Okay well he is rather thin.
Personally I think he's been wasting away. Look at him a year ago- he looks fine. Now? No way- he looks awful. Something is definitely stressing him the hell out. I wonder if it's THIS. I mean, Anthony is only ONE of his stalkers, right? There are quite a few crazy motherfuckers yapping up quite a storm on the net. And a few of them are bonafide stalkers- waiting for him outside TWC, following him around NYC, waiting outside his house... I don't even know where the man lives, but THEY do. That must freak him out and make him not want to come out.
At least two of his stalkers other than stalker boi, allegedly post on his "fangurl moment & naughty chair" boards. His show is not the only public venue he has gone to complain. He discusses this topic with the people he knows well. I don't think he realizes the danger he places himself when he casually mentions his concerns to friends and acquaintances. Because of this failure on his part to cease the attention away from the stalkers, they remain scary pests. It wasn't long ago that we heard that he was concerned about a female stalker. He didn't end it there. By the time he was finished complaining that week to people off camera, there were endless possibilities posed as to who that might be. There were several girls mentioned whom others KNEW were stalking him and they assumed that he referred to that stalker either on his show or in conversations with others. Betty B is right on target, he's a stalkers best friend. Anderson is feeding the frenzy they need to persevere and continue to stalk. I think he's actually making their craziness fun for them. Where could a nutjob get more attention? TV and print is the ultimate. He does both and often. A change in habit regarding how he approaches stalking might make the world of difference.
In addition to Anthony, I think he's concerned about a particular woman whom he contacted a few yrs ago ONCE when a friend asked him to call her when she was ill. That was the end of it for him, but not her. She's supposedly had numerous medical issues both physically and mentally. Unfortunately, this dip is only one of many.
"Good god, he's not a poor little guy all skinny and vulnerable."
I was being a little cute with him. But yes, he has gotten thinner, I think. Most noticeably to me when he came back from the month in Iraq last year.
Actually, the original handwriting sample I have of his, is from THAT month that you are talking about. It SCREAMED "depressed".
Poor Anderson!! :(
And anonymousaba... what on earth is he supposed to do, other than what I said a few posts up about getting stronger himself? All personal strengths come from within, and he strikes me as a genuinely good person. Is he supposed to start acting like an asshole? Well, no I don't recommend THAT. But everyone talks to friends when they're freaked out about something, don't they? How is that bad... unless those people tell it to others and down the line it goes. OH THAT IS NOT COOL, not cool at all!
One of the big problems is that he is very polite due to the way he was raised, and also likes to talk to people... and those people read it all sorts of OTHER ways instead of what it actually is- nice guy being nice to you. He's not intentionally passing the wrong message, I don't think. Actually (believe it or not) that is MY problem. I'm nice to everyone! It gets ME in trouble for that very reason I just said- people read it the wrong way.
And as for stalker boi... you know... I don't just randomly go around beating people up, just so you all UNDERSTAND that part, lol. I only defend myself if the opportunity arises. Of course, in the two times that did happen, I beat the royal shit outta them. You know... "well he hit me first!" heehee
He's not a poor little guy, skinny -yes, but that's about it. even if he was huge it wouldn't eliminate the stalking problem. Other then feeling terrorized and violated privacy as a result there's a big concern of one of the stalkers turning violent. When you have a lot of stalkers chances increase.
@betty b, is it the case that a lot of serious stalkers don't realize they are stalkers? That they don't look at their behaviour as stlaking. In this case would those people take what ac said on their account?
@anonimousaba
Why is it dangerous for him if he talks about stalking with friends? I agree that the way he brings it up 3rd time on TV does come off as he's trying to address stalkers directly. And 3rd time he's told that they don't think in terms of sympathy to the person they're stalking.
Let's see if stalker boi turns up next week at the signing in Atlanta...
Btw, when Anderson first talked about HIS stalkers on his show recently a fan blog (who gives the tribune to the stalker-boy) said that they got at least 5 emails from "friends and readers" who thought he might be talking about them. Also they had to deal with some crazy fans who saw them as competitors and gave them hell. And those were different people from the concerned ones. Nice, right?
@anna anderson- wouldn't surprise me in the least.
He already followed him to NOLA! Jesus Christ almighty....
And uh, anonymousaba? Would you PLEASE email me. THANK YOU.
"When Anderson first talked about HIS stalkers on his show recently a fan blog (who gives the tribune to the stalker-boy) said that they got at least 5 emails from "friends and readers" who thought he might be talking about them."
IF that was me, I am not sure I would put that up on a blog. If someone is watching Anderson's stalkers, I certainly don't want to be put on their list.
Yeah, DUH for them :) Stalker-boi... now he's a real piece of work, don't you think? And the ones wondering if they're stalkers... they are probably wondering if they're going a bit much on the Ander-obsession. Don't worry about THEM... people who wonder if they are nuts, are usually sane. It's the ones that are convinced they are sane when they're really NUTS that are the problem, because they don't realize that the thing they do are NOT RATIONAL.
@anon 12:40 -that blog didn't mention by name (or nick) who sent those emails (they're friends and readers, remember?) so they weren't exposed to the public
You can't track people by their IP address? But I guess they can be sitting at the library or Kinko's computer.
I don't know.
@Newsjunkie
I agree this is about power. The more attention you give them, the more your emotions fluctuate, the more power you are giving your stalkers. And it doesn’t matter if he has plenty of bodyguards HE IS THE FIRST ONE WHO MUST ACT AND DECIDE (and it starts with feeling stronger in the inside). That sends the clear message, I am not weak you haven’t gotten to me and Be sure I WILL DEAL with you! That’s what I mean when I said he should decide whatever it is he is going to do and stick with it. Doing nothing about this gives the impression that you think you deserve this and have to put up with it. Well, no!
After he stands up for himself he should just allow his staff to deal with it. And I really don’t get it, I’ve been watching 360 for a couple of years now, and generally Anderson stands up for himself when he is being cornered- and pushed by intelligent “normal “people. Why can’t he stand up for himself when it comes to obsessed borderline people? Those are the most dangerous. Hello?????
Stop whinning already and do something about it- for your safety and those loved ones around you! Because that’s the other thing whenever he decides to formalize a relationship, that person may be placed in danger if he does not stop this right now. Significant others are usually first in line as targets.
@ Ivy
Yes I think some people don’t realize that they are stalkers themselves. But Anderson is not sending a clear message as to where his limits stand. For most this could be acceptable behavior. And there are others that are not emotionally stable, those are the hardest to deal with, but not impossible. As I said you should let people know where you stand regarding you personal safety and privacy, period. If he is worried and I have the feeling by now that he is worried sick- he should ask advice from professionals on his own time and dime. Asking someone on TV as to how to deal with stalkers is rather, well not very intelligent. Military commanders do not discuss their war strategies before they engage the enemy….
Also some people (the ones that still have a shred of dignity and are not crazy and obsessed) can be taught what the acceptable behavior is. For example when you travel to another country you learn that they are huge differences when it comes to people sharing their personal space with others. You learn pretty quickly where you stand in relation to others. For some countries touching, kissing and standing close to each other is not also acceptable but encouraged- if you do not take this in to consideration you may be viewed as uninterested, distanced and disrespectful. So my point is people know where you stand when it comes to personal space. This is very evident from the moment you see a person for the first time. Its part of that persons non verbal language. His body language should reflect "yes Im listening but they are LIMITS as to the way I WILL ALLOW YOU to approach me!" For this to work he must be convinced he has the right to challenge people who violate his personal integrity and right to privacy. If he is not convinced well how you do you expect that other people understand that what they are doing is wrong?
betty b: I think Anderson was (and still is) liking the attention he is getting, does whatever he does to encourage it or at least not stop it. He does work to be a good journalist and I feel likes having his own anchor chair. He is a very nice person with from what I can see a good personality, funny, handsome, seems humble and considerate, etc. All those nice qualities people like in a person. Then you have CNN advertising him.
Then the stawker thing gradually creeps up on you and, oooh, now I might have some problems here and how do I deal with it, what do I do? What did I create?
I think you know what I'm trying to say here, not too sure I verbalized it well.
@betty b
I also think that he's very worried by now, but maybe he tries to be polite and to send a message in a nice way, kind of, not to anger those stalkers who he thinks might be potentionally violent and this way not to bring them over the edge from adoring him to being angry with him and taking action
Being nice to all stalkers? He may be increasing his database of stalkers...If he does something now, maybe, just maybe, he may control the situation.
I have thought of some people getting violent and angry. First of all, I think they may not be that many (the real crazy ones) and I think Anderson and CNN know who they are by now. Second, their state of mind really does not depend on Anderson's . The moment Anderson does something they dont like ( without Anderson knowing it), the rules can change. I think professionals do have a way of dealing with this. He shouldn't be so afraid.
I also think sending nice messages to your stalkers is like sending gretting cards to a 2 year old. They look at the image, not understanding what it means or how to literaly read it- ( they just see cute images on a paper) and trust me it wont prevent them from starting a temper tantrum when they dont get what they want...
I think we all agree he needs to do SOMETHING, and Betty B is saying what I think is a good idea. Now, how does he go about implementing that? I mean, what exactly should he do? Right now, yes, his politeness is biting him in the ass. It's gone on too long. Also yeah, he sort of likes the attention but... it went too far, and the reaction is "oh shit now what?"
God I feel really sorry for the position he's in.
Hello everyone!
@Betty B would you mind contacting me through email?
christiane@freakspeaker.com
newsjunkie
He should start by acknowledging that this is a problem that needs to be dealt with.
Remember the famous phrase "hope is not a plan"? Well worrying is not exactly a plan either!!!! He should ask professionals for help- privately not in front of millions of viewers!!!! He should also seek suppport. Stalkers have a way of getting on peoples nerves and emotional stability, and he should learn to deal with the physical but also the emotional threat.
By the way this is just my opinion...
Well, I happen to agree with your opinion, fine by me :D
I think it would be SO hard with someone in his position to deal with this. I mean, as an actor or something, you could be rude as hell if you wanted. But not Anderson, no, he has to remain polite because of his job. He can't turn off his personality or charm because he has to be able to continue his work, and that is dealing with people and being someone that people can TALK to. It's his job for people to trust him and talk to him. He has to be able to fit in anywhere, basically.
I think he's starting to feel rather desperate about the situation.
his charm and politeness can stay but betty b is right that from the first time he went on bringing himself as an example it sounded like he's giving a direct message to stalkers that it bothers him and they need to stop. That's exactly what he is advised not to doand he's engaging all stalkers at once. His body languaged pointed to his vulnerability and human side which stalkers want to see I guess.
You know what I see when I look at Anderson? And why I think he's desperate about this?
Because after the signing I went with a friend to my favorite gay bar in New York. And that's when it hit me, what I'd seen when I stared right at him, two feet away. I saw utter and complete soul-eating despair. I wanted to cry while I was sitting in the bar. I just got up and almost left my damn friend there- I couldn't focus on having a good time after that.
I think his despair may be the result of the stalking issue and other stuff. The stalking issue may be easier to handle in comparison, therefore he should not be afraid/hestitant on depending on other people to help him with this particular issue. There is only so much a person can take at the same time.
Yes, you can only take so much before you just start to break down inside.
I don't think that's what's causing his despair. I have a completely different theory on that based off my handwriting analysis of him. The stalking though, that's just draining on you from the stress. So if you're already a mess... that's just not going to help.
Newsjunkie: from your post "I saw utter and complete soul-eating despair"
I took 3 stupid pills today instead of my usual 2. Not asking you to give your opinion of whether or not you think Anderson is gay because I think you said you won't/don't do that. But are you saying that the gay people you saw there have the utter and complete soul-eating despair? Or just referring to the people in general you saw there?
I might have a look of utter soul-eating despair on me if I continued to see the likes of the stalker dude and the other woman you met at the signing following me around.
I agree that Anderson talking about his stalker was not a good idea and that he probably did so out of desperation.
As for the alleged female stalker he called a few years ago, I did exchange a few emails with that person early last year. This was before this blog was created. I don't think she stalks him anymore, so she is probably not the person he is referring to.
heeee's baaaaaack........stalker boy
Marie: are you saying Anderson CALLED a stalker on the PHONE? What was that boy thinking?
@anon 10:26
I am referring to the female who was ill, but yes, he called her.
anon 10:24: I was in a gay bar because half my freaking friends are gay and that's where we hang out. I was sitting there thinking about Anderson because I'd just seen him a couple hours earlier and the "soul eating despair" is what I saw on ANDERSON'S face. Of course... a couple of my gay friends look like that too, what can I say. But yeah. I'm not saying whether or not I think AC is gay. Yup, not telling. I have an opinion, oh certainly. After meeting him it is now in cement!!
anon 10:26 (who I think is the same person)- read all the comments on here. The woman was mentioned, AC called her when she was sick years ago or something and she whacked out on it apparently. She wasn't a stalker then, but the word is that she is NOW.
And Marie? I think you're full of shit. Why the hell would she email YOU?
When you think about it, Anderson must hate doing these book signings, it just heightens this whole stalking subject.
To think that someone has been to 10 or whatever # of book signings since his book came out last year is mind boggling.
Last year, I remember reading about fans that went to multiple book signings within the same day. I'd be totally embarassed to do this but then again, I don't get all "fangirly" over celebrities.
Now I'm starting to understand why Anderson likes to be "on the go" and traveling all of the time as well as keeping his travels a secret until last minute. This keeps the stalkers at bay!
It's really sad because I'm sure there are fans of Anderson and his show who are perfectly normal but how would Anderson ever know this, he can't trust anyone because he's got too many weirdos obsessed with him!
Yeah JR, think about how much that would suck.
You can't have a relationship because you're freaked that they might not be what they say they are, or that they might betray you, or that they just want to use and abuse you. I think you can imagine that... I can. HOW CRAPPY.
You end up desperately needing love and you can't find it because you constantly get hurt. So... instead you bury yourself in pain and misery, either your own or other people's. THAT SUCKS REALLY BAD, how many times can I scream THAT?!!
Sharla, unless the person was a copycat of that woman who says she was ill when Anderson called her, YES I did exchange a few emails with her!
I, fortunately, have experienced minor stalking incidents in my lifetime but I would be very creeped out if there were more than one person stalking me.
On the other hand, you'd think that this kind of thing happens to all celebrities so there must be some kind of way to handle these persistent fans.
People and behaviors are the hardest thing to control, IMO.
I just finished taking a RAD (Rape, Agression, Defense) course. Absolutely loved it and it gave me a boost of confidence so Newsjunkie, let's go kick some stalker ass! LOL
Yeah JR, let's hang out :D
Sorry Marie, I mean to sound like I'm a mean bully. I'm not... sooooo sorry I yelled at you. This topic really has me on edge. That was really rude of me. I apologize.
But to be SERIOUS, no... beating them up is not the answer. As much as it might make the beater feel better, the beat-ee has learned nothing. That's not the goal, is it??
Oh, I totally agree, beating someone up is not the answer...I was only kidding Newsjunkie....
I'm not sure what the answer is because stalkers can be very unpredictable and you surely don't want to piss them off because that's when they get all "psycho" on you!
Psychosis is a generic psychiatric term for a mental state often described as involving a "loss of contact with reality". Stedman's Medical Dictionary defines psychosis as "a severe mental disorder, with or without organic damage, characterized by derangement of personality and loss of contact with reality and causing deterioration of normal social functioning."
People experiencing a psychotic episode may report hallucinations or delusional beliefs (e.g., grandiose or paranoid delusions), and may exhibit personality changes and disorganized thinking. This is often accompanied by lack of insight into the unusual or bizarre nature of their behaviour, as well as difficulty with social interaction and impairment in carrying out the activities of daily living.
Thank you, Wikipedia. Yeah, that describes a stalker pretty well, don't you think?
After searching for the past 10 min, I finally found and reread the last email I wrote to her and she responded to. In that email, I had written the following "Thank you for sharing your story with me and I will not post it anywhere nor discuss it with anyone." I owe an apology to her for breaking my promise.
To that person: I am sorry I brought it up and will stop talking about it as I had promised.
That 2nd. paragraph describes the stalker I onced ecperienced right to the last word....difficulty with social interaction and impairment in carrying out the activities of daily living.
So true....
Yeah... lots of times they hear those infamous voices, you know, like they'll look at Anderson on the TV and think he's talking to them, and I mean TALKING RIGHT TO THEM, you know what I mean.
Shit, I think he's you know, talking to the camera? Uh, yeah? And I'm just listening to what he says. He ain't talking to me unless he says my name first, and he's only said it when reading one of my comments. Therefore, he isn't talking to me. Does that make sense?
The voices, though, like I was saying... they'll hear whatever they want. Or he might say "nice to meet you" and they'll read all sorts of intonations that aren't there, most likely that he loves them or something. Of course, there are also the ones that wrap their heads in tinfoil and refuse to leave their house. Those are a different breed of psychotics...
The stalker mindset... well, one of the members of my band is almost done with his degree in Psychology. I asked him about the mind of a stalker. He said that the ones most likely to snap are the ones that have a sexual fixation on their target, and the person will do something that the stalker sees as a "soiling" or "stain" upon the image that the stalker has of the person. That's when they go try to hurt them.
Uh oh.... sounds like Stalker Boi... let's hope THAT doesn't happen.
Newsjunkie...Oh just go burst my bubble now why don't you....Anderson is not speaking to me directly when he's on TV? And to think all this time I thought I had that special "connection" with him! Boo Hoo!
Just kidding....
I can only hope stalker boi isn't thinking of going to the Atlanta or Florida book signings. Afterall, how many of those darn books would you want signed anyway?
I meant to ask you Newsjunkie, when you went to NYC book signing, did you find the security to be pretty intense? When I went to a book signing last year, security wouldn't even let you "mingle" with the crowd after you were done getting your book signed. They scooted you right out.
Don't take anything personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.
That's the second of the four agreements, which is from a Toltec Wisdom Book by Don Miguel Ruiz. I highly recommend it. The book is touted as "A practical guide to personal freedom". IT'S AWESOME.
If you keep this agreement, you can travel around the world with your heart completely open and no one can hurt you. You can choose to follow your heart always. Then you can be in the middle of hell and still experience inner peace and happiness. You can stay in your state of bliss, and hell will not affect you at all.
Anderson? Are you listening? Go get this book. I think it might *help you* (and a million other people, should they be so smart to go buy it too).
@jr- no. As a matter of fact, Madame X hung around inside staring at him for quite a while. I personally was outside for a good half hour, watching the people come out, checking them out. Like I said, lots of squeeing going on... and people sort of doodling around trying to look like they weren't hanging around to see if Anderson would come out soon. I was eyeballing ALL of them... and then, you know, I left, because I wasn't going to hang around like some dumbass fangurl. I wasn't standing there for THAT reason, actually I was talking to most of the people that came out, trying to get a feel for the reasons that people had come.
@jr
security was not intense. It was present but more to watch out for something serious. After you signed the book one of the organizers/announcer person asked to go out of the cordoned seated area to keep the space in front clear. However people stood right behind the rope -there was a line forming behind it and you could go hang out there (that's where madam x was staning long after she fisrt signed her book).
That's interesting because you would think that a NYC book signing would require even more security since it's Anderson's home town.
The whole time during the book signing I went to, security was eyeing the crowd like there was no tomorrow. I was actually getting paranoid because they kept looking at me as though I had some type of weapon on me and all I had on me was my purse and a bag with the book in it.
It did not make sense to me at the time but now it does. They were constantly looking over the crowd because of the whole stalker situation with Anderson.
It was also interesting because we all thought AC would arrive to the bookstore by car but he walked over from the hotel and then some gay obnoxious Anderfan approached him on the street to meet him and security was all over him like you can't believe. And what did they do then, let him come back in the building and get his book signed...go figure!
It was interesting to scope out the crowd though. All I can say is that Anderson has a wide variety of fans!
Yeah JR, the fan diversity was highly interesting to me, that's why I was watching them all come out. I assume there was security all over the place and I just couldn't see them. However, the bookstore is actually right in the Time Warner Center, so, I figured the cameras in the building were quite happily keeping a watch on everyone.
But yeah- they let everyone in. It's a bad line that they're toeing there. They (CNN) want their star anchor to be personable, accessible, and out in public view. What concerns me is that they apparently don't give less than a SHIT about Anderson's personal welfare other than just making sure he doesn't end up dead somewhere (which would... lose them money, how sick is that.)
Eh. I'm so tired I'm falling over on my laptop. I'll be back in the morning to see what fascinating conversation has been going on while I'm snoring away in my bed with the Sock Monkey Sheets on it.
I was at the signing and I saw 3 security guards. Couple of people among organizers kept people moving from the front area if they stood there too long taking pictures, but that was more to keep the event orderly. they seemed to be screening the ccrowd too There was no bag search or any screening to enter.
I mentioned the ill girl because he asked a female acquaintance OUT OF THE BLUE if she knew of this girl.The two girls have nothing in common other than the healthy girl previously lived close to the city where ill girl worked. The circles they travel in couldn't be more different. Healthy girl is in her late 20's, a journalist, poised, beautiful, fashionable, cut from a similar cloth as AC. I know zilch about ill girl, except for healthy girls take. She concludes serious physical & emotional issues on ill girls side of the pond. Previous experience has me siding with her perspective. A major issue is what Marie described here. Ill girl had or has time on her hands to gather lots of online buddies. She thinks it dandy to create a cyberaudience of Anderfans willing to hear her tired old stories. He has reason to believe she stretched 1 contact into a relationship. I would not discuss problems such as ill girls obsessions to acquaintances if I were in his shoes. Simple logic says healthy girl would not know, nor have heard of ill girl. I have no idea which female stalker he's referred to on tv. Could be more than one,and both genders. He does have overzealous stalkers of both genders.
Next week, newsjunkie. Busy since late this morning and tommorow is Mother's Day - inlaws favorite day, meaning brunch in the city. Hope your three little men are extra kind to you today.
Newsjunkie:
"They (CNN) want their star anchor to be personable, accessible, and out in public view. What concerns me is that they apparently don't give less than a SHIT about Anderson's personal welfare other than just making sure he doesn't end up dead somewhere"
Who do you think is carrying (paying for) Anderson's life insurance policy? What a thought.
anon 2:39: unfortunately two of my three little men do not live with me. It's a horrid situation that if I think about it too long will make me start crying my eyes out. But thanks for saying it.
I'm curious what you have to say next week?
anon 7:14: what does life insurance have to do with anything? For one thing, the LIFE INSURANCE company pays up on that, not THEM. But still, I'm not even talking about that. I'm talking about how they practically throw his ass out and dangle it over the wolves like fresh meat and hope he doesn't actually get eaten!!
newsjunkie- where are your other two kids? what's the horrid situation? now I'm curious too.
Eh. I get asked that all the time. People are so shocked when they find that out. I think I've now gotten three emails politely asking "gee, why?" Well I just went and explained it. If you wanna know, go look. I have a public opinion, like I said, about everything. I have a private opinion, too, which I write in a paper journal that no one can see. And I don't give a flying crap if people know details about me because with Google you could find all this shit out anyway. I'm just saving you the trouble.
"what does life insurance have to do with anything?"
Newsjunkie:Somebody must be paying the premium, you don't get it for free. I used to work for IBM and Raytheon, and they paid my life insurance premiums and I designated my beneficiary in the event of my death. If Anderson is shot and killed in Afghanistan or anywhere, sounds like more than a workman's comp case, maybe if he only injured. Guess that was my point, but maybe it isn't really a point.
@ To all
Sorry, one more thing but I think it is very impt.
I agree with what newsjunkie's friend said. Stalkers can snap when you least expect it. That’s why I said it has nothing to do with AC saying nice things to them. As soon as he does something they don’t agree with, well they can take it the wrong way and snap. And yes it is sexual, sexuality is about desire not necessarily sex- but that’s another topic.
Stalkers come in all colors and shapes. Yes some have mental disorders, for example, psychosis (Axis I- DSM) just like the woman on the limo that AC talked about. They may hallucinate but given their degree of impairment, their disorder is a lot more obvious to those around them and well because its obvious you are warned.
But then there are those who have personality disorders- (Axis II –DSM). Some can be persistent, obsessive and equally dangerous, and although they exhibit a degree of impairment, it can be mild and not that obvious to those around them (it becomes obvious when you learn what to listen and watch for, mostly patterns of thought and behavior). People with Axis II disorders (borderlines etc.) don’t do very well with medication, mostly because it has little to do with chemical (or hormonal imbalances) and much to do with the childhood experiences that formed them- their psychic structure. Borderline patients lie just in the middle of psychosis and neurosis, they heavily fixate on people and are very, very hard to treat-it takes years if not decades. Ask any psychologist as to which type of patient they prefer to see in their private practice, it’s very likely they say Axis I.
In other words, those people whose erratic behavior is not that obvious can also be very dangerous...So look out!
Hi folks, long-time lurker first time commentor.
As someone who has had a stalker in the past, and who has experience working with the mentally ill, I just wanted to say that I have found this thread particularly interesting and informative. I have some thoughts on the subject; I'm not really in a position to post them now since they are still pretty jumbled and not well-formed. Maybe later. But at any rate, I just wanted you to know that I appreciate your illuminating thoughts.
@anon 9:53
I think what newsjunkie meant is that cnn's marketing of AC as a celebrity doesn't aid his journalistic credebility and does aid obsession and stalking situation. They kind of promote unhealthy attention to him, presenting him not as a reporter but as a poster boy. Maybe it's good for ratings and their income but I don't think it's good for him.
hi sydney! I think we've "met" in the past -) It would be interesting to hear your experience and your thoughts
Thank you, Ivy, post at 10:38. CNN has to take some responsibility for the protection of their employees. Not just from stalkers but from the dangerous places they travel to.
@jr
thanks for sharing your story about the signing you went to. This discussion made me think of sharing what I saw. I went to the lecture at the Museum of Radio and TV the other day and it so happened that I came there at the same time Anderson did. I don't know how he arrived there or how if he walked or the car brought him right there, I got to the enrtance door and he was waking in right in front of me! He was with his agent but without a bodyguard. I didn't say anything to him, he has enough people trying to approach him, that must freak him out by now.
jr: his agent isn't that lady standing next to him at the book signings is she? she was the same woman I saw with him last year.
Ahhhh, I love Betty B :D Your viewpoint is much appreciated due to your expertise!
@sydney- feel free to share your thoughts, jumbled or not. Mine come out that way sometimes because I have trouble trying to figure out how to say what I want to say. People will figure it out, don't worry.
@ newsjunkie
We all love and enjoy your comments, inteligence and sense of humor.
@ sydney
I also join in to say that I would really like to hear your thoughts on this subject. Its incredible how many women in this thread have gone through the same experience. I have learned so much. I just never realized how common this problem had become until now.
Well, I guess I really don't have a lot to add that hasn't already been discussed. Being stalked is emotionally exhausting, even if the person is harmless (which, fortunately in my case, he was). But it's still not a good feeling to wake up and realize you have to spend the day looking over your shoulder, wondering how many letters and/or casette tapes you'll get in the mail that day (this was in the "stone age" before email). Not to mention the ribbing from mutual friends (he was an acquaintence before he went all bat shit on me). I even went so far as to date someone I wasn't that into in an attempt to drive the stalker away (naturally that didn't last long - I think the poor guy figured out he was being used). Finally after a year and a half of torture I got relief (unfortunately, it was at the expense of some other poor girl who became his new object of obsession).
There is happy ending here, which usually doesn't happen. We were both able to go on with our lives relatively unscathed - the last I heard, he was married, had a good job, and was by all accounts happy and healthy, as am I for the most part. I think the only reason for this is instead of being mentally ill, I believe he was just seriously socially inept. At the time I laughed the whole incident off (once it was over), but now with the world going the way it is, I find myself thinking about it and I realize how incredibly lucky I am that he wasn't psychotic.
I never realized how pervasive mental illness was until several years ago when I started my current job (I process disability claims). Yes, some people are obvious, but what's most disturbing are the ones that aren't. They can initially seem perfectly normal when speaking to them, but then they'll either say something, or you'll read something they've written and you're like "Whoa, what is going on in that head?" Some scary stuff, that's what. I find myself keeping everyone at arm's length so I don't end up on some wacko's "list". My work days can be draining, to say the least.
I can't even begin to imagine how someone like Anderson, who's known to so many people and probably has multiple stalkers, deals. How do you distinguish between someone who is merely an admirer from someone who's obsessed and unbalanced? Reading and blogging about Anderson is just a hobby to me, a way to escape my daily stresses. I hate to think that in some small way I may have contributed to his. That's why if I ever saw Anderson just walking down the street, as much as I would like to meet him, I would leave him alone (Of course, an official event like a signing or lecture would be totally different). I would hate to add to his stress and have him think I could be one of "those".
Sorry to have rambled, I just needed to get that all out. Thank you.
I know exactly what you mean, Sydney. I feel the exact same way- if I saw the man on the street I'd ignore him. He's got enough problems without ONE MORE PERSON coming up and saying hi to him. It must stress him the hell out, because like you said, you can't tell who is nuts, and who is nice.
This is totally off topic and don't even know why I'm wondering or why/how on earth this even entered my head.
When Anderson's mother passes away, I was sitting here wonder how big of a funeral it will be as in how much coverage it will get and with all the cameras on her beloved Anderson. O.K., you all may think I'm weird for even having thought of this and posting it.
That's not a weird thought. Personally I think it would end up a very private and quiet funeral. Her sons would not want it to be a media spectacle, I'm sure. Anderson would most likely clam up and never say a word about it. That is apparently how he deals with his personal pain.
That is so not good for you :(
Not that I'm saying he should go out in the street screaming STELLA, but... shoving pain into the back of your soul and never dealing with it can kill you inside.
Yes, from what I gathered he has said about writing his book is that he ran from his pain and didn't deal with it, didn't talk about it. I get the feeling his mother was not much on talking about this kind of stuff with her two young sons after they lost their father, she may be better at it now, I don't know.
I certainly hope that he would have at least that one confidant to talk with about things. Hasn't he said he feels like 80 or words to that effect? Maybe that's why.
Some people freak out at death and they don't know what to say or do. I've thought about it often because my ex-husband is a police officer- he could get killed anytime, basically. I read a couple books about it, just in case, and I also took Child Psychology so that I'd have a grip on how to handle it. I did learn one neat thing, which is a Jewish term, called "sitting shiva" I think.
Pretty much, as my friend told me, most people don't have a clue what to say to you (her mother died). She said that people avoided her like she'd suddenly developed a plague. But sitting shiva basically means you go to the person and just SIT there and let them talk while you say nothing. Just your presence and listening to them, let's them know they are loved and cared about in their time of grief.
I would assume he has a "confidant" like you're talking about. However, like I said... I think he'd clam up and just keep it inside.
Due to the volume of this Post, I'm closing this one and just opened a new one named Stalking Anderson cooper 2 that is at the top of the page.
You might keep discussing the topic there. Easier to read!
THANKS!
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